Singles New Years Resolutions

Here at Great Expectations Boca Raton, we are gearing up for another fantastic year! 2010 brought us 5 weddings, and  already have at least 5 weddings in the works for 2011! Now is also the time when everyone starts making those New Years Resolutions: lose weight, pay off debts, find true love... Well, we can't help with the first two, but we put together a list of Singles New Years Resolutions to help you on your path to true love:

1. Make a list. While this blogger doesn't particularly believe in The Secret, I do believe you can't get what you want if you don't ask for it. So make a list. Write down all the qualities in the person you are seeking, and be specific. Instead of "good looking," try "makes me laugh." Instead of "must have an MBA, try "can have intelligent conversations." Putting it down on paper not only makes you really think about whats truly important, but puts it out there in the universe to come back to you.
2. Love yourself. Not to sound hokey, but you really can't find true love with someone else, until you love yourself. Finding someone will never make you whole. You have to both be whole first. Focus on your own personal goals, whether it be to lose weight, get that promotion at work, or finally finish master the art of photography. The love you show for yourself will show and will attract others to you.
3. Equally, Lose the negativity. Stop holding on to the grudges, the mistakes made by the ones who scorned you. All that negative energy shows and repels new love away from you. Instead of "I'll never find someone," try "this is MY year!" Believe in the power of positive thinking. Remember, things may not always turn out the way you planned, but the always end up the way they were supposed to.
4. Be open.  Let it be known that you are single and looking. Let friends, family and coworkers (and Great Expectations!) fix you up. You never know who you are going to have chemistry with, so just go for it. If no love match is made, it was one meeting. You never know, this person could become a great resource for work, or even a tennis partner. Your girlfriend wants to go speed dating? GO! The more you network, the better the change of meeting Mr. Wonderful!
5. Know your patterns. Always fall for the bad-boys? Always give 110% and never receive in a relationship? Always forget about your girlfriends when you fall in love? Then make this the year to change all of that. We all have patterns we fall into in a relationship. Be aware of yours and know the signs. Make a pact with your girlfriends that they will tell you if you slip up and fall into the same routines.

So, there you go. A few resolutions to get you on the right path to true love. May 2011 be YOUR year! Have you made any singles resolutions of your own? We'd love to hear your thoughts! Tell us in the comments below.

Happy New Year to all from your friends at Great Expectations Boca Raton!

Dating During the Holidays...Part 2

So you have a new love this Holiday season...Great! Now what?! Here are some tips to help you through your first Holiday Season together:

1. Gifts.

This is a tough category for many new couples who may be in the early stages of dating. Casual dating does not necessarily equal a gift, but if you are exclusive and committed, then yes, a gift is appropriate. This does not mean that it had to be large and extravagant. Something thoughtful, but something they would appreciate. Maybe they have mentioned a gadget or trinket they covet, a new book by her favorite author, his favorite bottle of scotch are all good choices. Even better are tickets to an event that you two can share together. Whether it's a sporting event or a Broadway show, an event you can share together will leave you both with memories that last a lifetime. What not to give? Gym memberships and exercise equipment will always backfire on you. Equally, lingerie may send the wrong message about your relationship and where it is going. Men, when in doubt, a little blue box with a white ribbon is always a safe bet! ;)

2. Family Gatherings.

When contemplating whether to invite your new significant other to family gatherings, consider the following: Is he/she going to be the only non-family member present? Is it a formal sit-down event? An odd family tradition that will make him/her uncomfortable? Will they have to sit through 6 hours of grampas stories or the opening of every cousins gifts one.by.one? Maybe let them pass on this event. Is it a cocktail party with both family and friends? Then this may be more appropriate for your new sweetie!

3. The Office Party.

As excited as you may be to show Gladys from accounting your new stud, this may not be the appropriate time or place. Again, some key factors to consider: Is your company budget conscious? Then a date may not be welcome by the big-wigs. Will your date get along with your co-workers? Remember, you will be the only one they know, so make sure they can mingle without being strapped to your side the whole night! Remember this is a work event, so if your sweetie tends to get a little out of control when punch is involved, you may not want to include him just yet, as he IS a reflection of you.....and that promotion you've had your eye on!

4. Differing Beliefs.

If you’re seeing someone that has a different religious belief, holiday dating can highlight conflicts in your spiritual thought process/beliefs. The key to avoiding problems is to be open and honest about your comfort level at all times. Don’t feel obligated to go to your date’s house of worship if you feel uncomfortable partaking in the religious rituals. As long as you are open and communicate your concerns you both can have a better time getting through the holiday season. It may also allow you the opportunity to see if you are both compatible in this area and if your relationship has the potential to last.

5. Work, Work and more Work!

This is also the time of year when a large majority of us will get a few weeks off, but until then, we work 'round the clock to get all of our projects done before then. Or we have end of year reports that need to be turned in before the New Year. This adds a whole other level of stress to not only the Holiday Season, but also a new relationship. This is good test of your lasting potential. Remember to be open and honest with your sweetie and let them know that is has nothing to do with them, and soon they will have you all to themselves!

Happy New Year from your friends at Great Expectations. May 2011 bring you all the Joy, Love and Happiness you deserve!

Dating during the Holidays....Part 1

For some, being single during the holidays can be tough, or it can be a great way to get out and meet new and interesting people. Here are some tips to assist you in making that love connection during the holidays:

1. Let everyone know you are single!
It’s the perfect time of year to broadcast to your friends that you single and searching and that you are available to accompany another single person to a holiday event should they need a date. Announce to your family that you’re single this holiday season, and because of that, you might invite someone to the festivities who is also single but doesn’t have family living close by to celebrate with. In the end, get the word out and expand your social network.

2. Accept every holiday invitation.
Unless a holiday party is a challenge to get to or you know an “ex” will be present, make a point of accepting every holiday invitation that comes your way – no matter how unusual, far fetched or random. In fact, the more events you attend the more comfortable you will become to step outside of your safety zone and expose yourself to new groups of people.

3. Be prepared for spontaneous Holiday Cheer!
As a single person, it may be assumed that your calendar is much more flexible than a parent with three kids. Therefore it may not be uncommon for someone like yourself to receive last-minute invites to holiday functions. Make sure you have one or two holiday outfits ready to wear that are clean, appropriate and festive.

4. Reconnect with old friends.
If you must have a date for an event, it is perfectly fine to consider an old friend or someone you know that is also single and searching. The evening can be a fun way to stroll around and socialize. Tell your single friend that you’ll be game to be their “date” for the next holiday gathering s/he might be invited to. It’s a great way to network and meet new people!

5. Plan for mistletoe and stolen kisses.
If you are single, there is no harm in hanging around the Mistletoe. This way, you can strike up a conversation about the silly mistletoe tradition and even cop a few great kisses! While many of the recipients may not be what you’re looking for, you never know….. people meet in the strangest places and you might just like someone that has been strolling around throughout the night. Hopefully, you can make eye contact with them and get them to walk over to your locale….under the mistletoe!

So, see, being single during the Holidays is not necessarily a bad thing! Get out there are spread that holiday cheer, and I bet this time next year you won't be single any longer!

Happy Holidays from your friends at Great Expectations!



Success Story: Kevin & Adelia

Nothing makes me happier than getting that phone call from a member that they are putting their membership on "freeze" with another member. Well, maybe when I get that that phone call that they are getting married, that REALLY makes me happy! We had a Summer of Love here in Boca, with a few weddings and a few more engagements. I'll be sharing the stories and photos as I get them.

Here is our latest Success Story: Kevin and Adelia.

Gang,

We want to thank you guys for introducing us.  I must say, all of your efforts resulted in meeting quality people and I would highly recommend your service to other people who seek love and marriage.

Adelia and I married on October 5, 2010.  We hope to finally buy our new home and if all goes well we look to start a family very soon.  Thanks to all who assisted us and best to you in your endeavors.

Sincerely,

Kevin



Kevin and Adelia, we wish you nothing but all the joy and happiness you deserve.

Sincerely,

Your Boca GE Staff

Is it love?

You have been battling in the dating war for some now- armour always on, when, suddenly, you realise that something is different. What is this I am feeling? Could it be the "L" word??? Here are some signs that you may have, in fact, been bitten by the Love Bug:

1. The past is suddenly the past. You stop comparing your new guy to your ex. You clear out all reminders of him/her. You find out your ex in engaged, and you are actually happy for them. Yep, you're over them!
2. You don't notice anyone else. That George Clooney look-a-like from accounting walks in and you don't even bat an eye. Yep, you are smitten with someone else!
3. You don't notice the socks on the floor. Or her annoying laugh is suddenly cute. Or whatever annoying thing that would have been a deal-breaker with anyone else, is suddenly no big deal, Yep, you have love goggles on!
4. Big or small, you share it all! You discuss not only the promotion you got (or didn't get) today, but also what was for lunch and the crazy lady you saw on the subway. Suddenly you want to know everything and share every detail. Yep, you're hooked!
5. You're not at the kid's table anymore! At every wedding, family reunion, or holiday, you bring them along. They've met all the family, and still accept you? This is a big one folks! Yep, you can now tell Aunt Gladys that you met a 'nice boy'.
6. Share and share alike. You not only start to show an interest in whatever your partner does, but you are also totally happy to share a blanket, some popcorn and a netflix. Yep, you're hooked!

Do any of these things describe you? well, congratulations! You, my friend, have found love! Any other sign you use to know when it's 'the real deal'? We'd love to hear about it!

How to pick a great dating profile photo

Here at Great Expectations, we look at and analyse profiles on a daily basis. Our goal is always to make sure each profile is going to attract the right type of person one is looking for, and maximize exposure. Here are just some of the things we look at when putting the profile together:

1. Is this person approachable? Make sure your look is confident, not cocky. Sweet, not sarcastic. Great setting...approachable, approachable, approachable! 

2. Good looks are important too. Let's not kid ourselves, we are all visual creatures! Profile photos should also have a good face and good body profile. If you have a better angle, make sure to show that off. And girls, men love hair! Loose, flowing hair is always attractive.

3. Clothing counts. Remember, you are not dressing for a a job interview. Dress as you would for a date. Ladies, the more casual the better- if you can look good in a t-shirt and jeans, then we know you can look good dressed to the nines. Men, ladies love a man in a suit! Solid colors work best in photos, except black or white white will wash you out or age you, and make sure the clothing fits and is not outdated. Sleeveless is also a no-no, no matter how much you work out, it still can be un-flattering. Also, dress appropriately for your age; Twenty-somethings need not wear a turtleneck, and sixty-somethings need not wear that halter top.

4. Show your personality! Do you like to golf? Then take some photos with your clubs! Baseball nut? Then strike a pose with your bat. Like the life in the fast lane? Then pose on your motorcycle! Let them see the real you. Just make sure your favorite hobby is only reflected in one photo- you are about more than your hobbies!

5. Flirt! Remember, you aren't applying for a job or posing for an ad in the JcPenney catalog, this is to attract the person you are seeking! Flirt a little with the camera... make them want to know what you are thinking!

6. Lighting matters. Natural light with the appropriate flash is most flattering (use a professional!), especially at dusk. Inside photos with too much flash can add years to your appearance. Also, natural landscape is flattering: trees, flowers, the ocean attract the eye.

So, once you put all these tips to use, you will surely have the best profile on the block!

Need a great photographer to help you with this? We have the best dating profile photographer around! You can view his work at http://www.treehouseproductions.net/ . Call Heather at 561-603-9251 to schedule an appointment today!

Passion is key

Passion is key in finding a true match. No, not that type of passion (although that doesn't hurt either). I am talking about the passion you have for whatever it is that you love to do. Whether it be a sport, a craft, an art or just watching Hell's Kitchen every Wednesday night. Whatever it is that you do that you are passionate about, keep doing it. Don't try something new to impress someone, or think you need to be someone else to catch someones eye. If you are true to yourself, that passion shows, and will attract the right type of person for you in the end. Ever notice when someone is passionate about something, they are more animated, talk a little louder, have a twinkle in their eye? So go ahead, write that book, watch your team win (or lose), catch up on your painting projects. You'll soon realise that you've lost track of time and trust me, that passion will show, and it will attract the right person for you. Preferably, one who also watches Hell's Kitchen!

Is he the RIGHT ONE?

Choosing the right partner is so very important to your happiness because it can affect every other aspect of your life. So if you are in a relationship that wish to move to the next level, the first thing you have to decide is if the person you're with is the "right one".

Before we decide if he's your right guy, let's find out what kind of man is at the top of your love list. In other words, who represents your number ten? Close your eyes and remember him. He's that one man from your past that makes your heart skip a beat when you think of him no matter how many years have gone by. Your "10" may have been a fleeting romance. Maybe he was your childhood sweetheart or that guy that broke your heart last year. When you think of him, the feeling you get deep in your heart is now your definition of a ten. Knowing the answer to this question is the beginning step on the road to recognizing your mister right.

So you've met someone you like. The first of many questions you need to ask yourself is "what number is this guy on your new scale?" If he ranks somewhere between 8 and 10 he is definitely in the running! Do you have that much sought after combination of a solid friendship as well as chemistry? How would you like to spend your time with him? Can you imagine yourself doing everyday things such as shopping, dining, dancing, traveling or sleeping with person? The absolute truth is that everyone just wants to be with someone they can laugh with, cry with, tell their secrets to and love with all their heart (not just s part of it). True Love is a friendship caught on fire! When the flames of passion start to fade over time only true friendship will keep the relationship on solid ground.

The way a man commits to his friends can tell you about how he commits in other aspects of his friendships. Does he have a lot of friends he's know for years? If he has a lot of childhood friends that's a great sign and may just have a "keeper" on your hands! Also look closely at his relationship with his parents or siblings. A man that is strong in this area usually is able to build a strong family of their own. Is he the Ying to your Yang? If his strengths complement your weaknesses, then you're on the right track. Do you respect who he is as a person? Is he a giver or a taker in the relationship? Does he respect who you are as a person and what you've accomplished in your life? What do your friends think of him? Sometimes they can see what you can't! Make sure to ask the dog too; your furry friend can tell instantly if he's right for you. Don't forget the moral, ethical, religious and family values. These are our core principles and we all need to be with someone who sees the world in a similar way to us on at least some key points.

So is he the Right Guy? You now have some great tools to help you find your answer!

Sheryel Aschfort is a relationship expert and the Director of Great Expectations Boca Raton.

Original Article from MODE LIFESTYLE Magazine, Jul/Aug 2009.

Pretty Little Liars

Everything I am about to tell you is based on what this blogger believes to be true. And what is that? Current research tells us that 20 million people visit an online dating site at least once a month. Sounds promising right?! Well, not once you get out there. Since online dating is easily accessible and affordable for all, it attracts all kinds. We're not saying it can't be done, but it's certainly exhausting to weed through all of the potential suitors to find your prince charming, especially when you hear these statistics: 50% of people lie in their online profile, and 80% of that is about their physical appearance (height, weight, etc). Scared yet? Well, take a look at these most popular online fibs and then I'll ask that question again!

Top Ten Online Dating Profile Fibs

1. Age.  We hear it every day. "Well, I am 50, but everyone tells me I  look 35, so I just put 35." That might be well and true, but do you really have anything in common with other 35 year olds? It might be fun for a minute, but isn't longevity the goal? 
2. Height/Weight. As we stated before, 80% of online daters lie about this. Men mostly lie about their height: The average male height in America is 5'9", the average online profile is 5'11''. Women tend to fib about the weight, shaving off at least 5 lbs. How do you expect to explain this when you actually do meet in person??
3. Photos. Statistics tell us that online profile photos are at least 3 years old, and the older the person, the higher that discrepancy gets. So that Studboy33 you've been chatting with all night? Yeah, he probably doesn't look like that anymore. My guess is, it's the best photo ever taken of him, and so he just keeps using it, even though it was taken 15 years ago at his cousin's wedding.
4. Occupation/Income. Online daters exaggerate their income by an average of 20%. Why? Because the higher the income listed, the higher the number of inquiries they receive. As far as occupation, people are very creative in this department! The postal carrier  puts Government, the unemployed are suddenly Freelance or Entrepreneur. Get the idea?
5. Marital Status. Ready for this? An astounding 30% of married men have an online dating profile!!!! And here you wonder why Studboy33 never wants to meet in person? Well, that's because he is married and he is just using online dating sites to stroke his ego a little bit, thinking of leaving his wife and testing the waters, or worse yet, looking for an affair. Another lie in this category? People often qualify themselves as 'Almost Divorced.' That is about as accurate as "A little bit pregnant."
6. Activities. Sure Studboy33 sounds like a catch. He goes on fantastic vacations, enjoys visiting wineries and taking hot-air balloon rides. Read: He did those things once and liked them. Don't be fooled into thinking he is jet-setting, wine connoisseur. Those rarely exist in online dating profiles. That just sounds more exotic than "I like to watch Nascar on Sunday with all my buddies". Sorry to burst your bubble!
7. Intentions. Ever notice how some people never find time to actually meet up in person? Well, because they are more comfortable sitting behind the veil of a computer screen than actually meeting face-to-face (or married-see #5!). Still others want to meet up right away, because their intention is to hook up  with you immediately. Some sites offer this option for you to input: Casual Dating, Serious relationship, Marriage, Friendship. Make sure to carefully read the profiles to see if their are any indications of the true intentions.
8. Education. Along with income, those with a higher education listed on their online profile receive more inquiries. Not the worst of fibs, who hasn't exaggerated on a resume before as well?!
9. Bad Habits.  Women are the biggest offenders in this category, often lying about smoking, as it is socially unacceptable to most. Other lies that fall into this category? Alcohol or drug use. Social drinking to me may be something totally different to you. And while I consider marijuana as an illegal drug, you may consider it a typical Friday night. 
10. Scammers. Here is the big one ladies and gentlemen! We hear horror stories every.single.day from both women and men about how they got scammed online. Some are obvious: As soon as you give them your info, you are overwhelmed with spam mail, and never send money to someone you met online! Some are not so obvious: Identity theft, or the worst one I ever heard: She came home from a weekend away with her new online beau to find her apartment cleaned out and his phone was suddenly disconnected. True Story.

So, I'll ask that question again...scared yet? I know I am! We are not saying online dating does not work. For some it does. You just have to know the facts and put on your coat of armor before jumping in. The only safe way to date? Great Expectations, of course! The only private, upscale singles club, where ALL members are screened in our office and background checks are done. Our members are who they say they are, do what they say they do, and look like their photos. Our staff has over 30 years of experience making matches happen every day. Remember, you won't find the right fish, if you're not looking in the right pond!

Come Here Often?

We all know that meeting someone on a bar stool or a website isn't the smartest thing to do. So where do you meet someone then? Friends? yes. Work? Not smart. Great Expectations? Definitely YES! But since that is not always an option, there are other ways to open up your dating pool safely. The trick is to meet someone where other people know them, can vouch for them, or have a background done by an organization. Here are a few ideas for you:

1. Do what you are passionate about. Like animals? Volunteer at the Humane Society. Like Horses? Take a Polo lesson. Love to cook? Take a cooking class. Love to Tango? Sign up for a dance lesson. This way you are in a group setting, meeting someone who already shares a similar interest to you.

2. Get Physical! Join a boot camp class, sign up for a marathon, take a golf lesson, join a cycling club. Whatever your sport of pleasure, this way you will meet new people and get in shape at the same time!

3. Get smart! Join a book club, take a class at the library or the University, join the Historical Society or Toastmasters. Is there a subject you've always wanted to know more about? There will be others that have the same thirst for knowledge!

4. Social Networking! Have a facebook account? Twitter? Linkedin? Although it's a website, most of the people you will meet are friends of friends, so instant comfort zone! Check out what events your friends are going to and join in. Fan your favorite restaurants, hot spots, organizations. You'll be the first to know about upcoming events, parties, openings and festivals.

5. Give back! Volunteering for your favorite charity is very rewarding. Habitat for Humanity, volunteer for the March of Dimes, or any other charity near and dear to your heart. You not only meet new people but feel good about yourself  at the same time!

Hope these ideas will help you get out there and meet a new group of people! Have another idea? Did you meet your significant other doing anything like this? We'd love to hear about it! Comment Below!

Boating, Blankets and Bingo: Great First Date Ideas

We all know that you only get one chance to make a first impression, and that concept is even more amplified when it comes to dating. Remember our Do's & Don'ts? So how do you stand out in a crowd? How do you wow your date in this tough economy? Tired of the coffee shop meetings? The cliche dinner and a movie getting old? (How do you get to know someone while watching a movie anyway?) Well, we have some ideas to help you out!

Great First Date Ideas:

1.  A picnic: Way more private, economical, and intimate that a restaurant. Pack a blanket, some wine, cheese, sandwiches, fruit, turn off the cell phone and get talking! No interruptions from a waiter, no awkward 'who pays the check' at the end, just relaxed conversation.

2. Get active: By the first date, you probably know enough about each other to know what interests you have in common. At least one of those is probably something active! So go for a hike, Rollerblade, golf, bowling, boating, whatever it is that you like. Healthy competition is always an icebreaker! I do not recommend certain activities though, such as tennis, swimming, or your favorite yoga class, as those do not work well with getting to know someone at the same time.

3. Get cultural. Check out an art gallery, a museum or take a historic tour. Nothing starts up a conversation like a Monet versus a Rembrandt or whether the old house on the corner is haunted!

4. Be a kid! Go to the zoo, the amusement park, get an ice cream cone, play bingo, see a magic show. Who wouldn't want to be a kid for a day again? What an easy way to let your guard down and really be yourself!

No matter what you do, just make sure that the date is stress-free, and you can both relax and (hopefully) enjoy each other's company.  That's the only way to know if there is going to be a Date #2!

Great Expectations Top Ten Dating Do’s & Don’ts

1.  Don’t be late. Being late does not increase anticipation, it shows lack of respect and that your time is more important than theirs.

2.  Dress to Impress. Dress appropriately for the location, don’t show too much skin, but look like you put effort into getting ready. You don’t get a second chance to make a first impression!

3.  Keep the conversation light. Avoid all talk of past relationships- good or bad, steer away from religion, politics & sex, and be sure not to come off as a “complainer”.

4. Listen and engage in the conversation. Ask questions, without getting too personal…this isn’t therapy!

5. Have a positive attitude!  Don’t be afraid to try a new cuisine, see a movie you wouldn’t normally see, or see a band that is out of your listening range. You never know, you just might like it!

6.  Don’t Drink & Date!  Know yourself and your limits. There is nothing sexy about a sloppy first date. Also, be cautious of what you order. We’re not saying stick to a salad, but if you order the steak, maybe don’t add the lobster! Show restraint & respect. It is a recession, after all!

7. Be realistic with your expectations. Dinner does not mean marriage. Go, enjoy yourself and see where it goes, but….

8. Don’t drag out the inevitable. If you are not feeling a connection, don’t stay for that second drink or dinner. Or give that good night kiss. Be honest with yourself and your feelings. No need to hurt anyone else’s feelings either.

9.  Who pays the check? Most men agree it is their responsibility, and gladly do so, but ladies, always offer! Don’t assume he will pay- no man wants to feel like a meal ticket!

10. If you had a good time, make sure to tell him! A follow-up call, text or email is always appreciated.